Today was one of the best days I've had in a really long time!!! Usually I am by myself during the day unless we go to a playgroup. But today one of my FAVOURITE students came by to spend the afternoon with me. She just graduated from college and has accepted a job in Greenville, SC. She is going to be teaching High School English and Drama. I can't believe it. It seems like just yesterday I had her in my classroom. She was always incredibly sharp and well spoken. A gorgeous girl inside and out. I remember one day - I think at the beginning of her Senior year she came taring into my classroom (and she rarely tared) and she blurts out "I can't do it! I can't do it!" I asked her what she was talking about and she said, "My whole life I thought I wanted to be an Elementary School teacher....but I was just upstairs listening to them say the pledge of allegiance and it was so slow and loud and I just thought I couldn't do that every day!" I told her it was okay, that she didn't have to be an El ed teacher - that she could be whatever she wanted. We didn't talk much more about it and it pretty much slipped my mind until toward the end of the year she mentioned that she just MIGHT major in English Ed. I knew immediatly that she could do it and encouraged her toward it, but not to worry if something else seemed to interest her too. I told her that most of us changed our majors a skillion times. At graduation in her Valedictorian speech, she mentioned me by name as one who had had an impact on her life she said "after putting me through what I thought was sheer torture, I began to see what a great thing being a teacher was and have chosen to continue my education in the field of English Education."
Talk about being humbled and proud all at the same time. To impact someone who you know is about 472 times smarter than you is quite a feeling.
We kept in pretty good contact through her time at school and especially while she was student teaching. I love nothing more than getting an e-mail from her asking me to remind her of how the preposition song goes or a fun idea for Valentines Day for her kids.
Today, as we sorted through some of my "teacher stuff" she said that she talked to her boyfriend a lot about me. She said, "I told him I just didn't know where I'd be today - that I probably wouldn't have become a teacher if it weren't for you." (or something to that affect) I was just dumbfounded. And, in that moment - as I was putting some of my very own teaching items from my old classroom into a box for her - I was grieving for a chapter in my life that had closed and for her was just beginning. I remembered exactly why I became a teacher.
I was a Sophomore when my boyfriend of 2 years up and broke up with me. It was truly heart wrenching and I, of course, couldn't imagine going on. At that time I was a music major but taking every Lit class I could squeeze in. I had signed up to take Creative Writing my Freshman year and it was a Junior course and I had to get special permission. I chased the professor down and caught her in the stairwell, told her I wanted to take her class, that I was sure I could handle it and so on. I remember - she looked at me for a moment and then signed my paper.
That moment changed my life. Creative Writing was the BEST class I had ever taken by FAR! I had it 7th period and was often tired and grouchy, but found that if I had a good Writing class I had a good day. I was amazed by the teacher - Miss Thompson. She was hilarious and creative and super happy and incredibly talented. She took time to help me and inspire me. After that, I took Shakespeare with her and then any other class I could get into my schedule that she taught. I couldn't tally the hours she spent with me.... helping me diagram compound complex sentences so that I could pass Advanced Grammar. When I memorized a 12 minute speech for an Oral Interp class - she slipped into the back of the classroom to see it. But it wasn't just me - she found a way to be that loving and inspiring to all of her students. You literally couldn't find one person who didn't like her.
When my boyfriend broke up with me - the first place I went? Her office. I remember literally running there - through the 230 feet of snow crying and sobbing that I didn't know what to do with my life. That maybe I should just go home and get a job writing for a paper and forget about college. She calmed me down and just challenged me to think about it. The next day - she came UP to my dorm room - with a yellow smiley face lamp and a nice card - telling me to stay the course and that she was praying for me. When she left, I turned to my roommate and said "If I could be her - if I could do what she does for someone, I would die happy." That's when I decided that I wanted to be an English teacher. I wanted to inspire kids to love Literature, but more importantly I just wanted to impact someone 1/4th of what she did for me." That was the moment I decided to become a teacher. I'm so happy I did.
Teaching was the best thing I ever did. Everyday I woke up just estatic about going to "work" What would my crazy kids do today? Until I met my husband, those were the best 3 years of my life.
Emily has Miss Thompson to thank for the impact I was able to have on her life. The most ironic part of this? They are BOTH living in South Caroline about 15 minutes away from each other - and they've never met.
It was hard going through my teaching stuff. I felt like I was giving Emily a kidney or something. I don't really "need" it to survive, but I feel better having it. I'd much rather it be used than have it sit in my closet. I felt like I was giving her a classroom in a box. Classroom, soul - - one of the two.
I used to think of my students as my kids. I didn't have children of my own at the time and couldn't imagine that their parents loved them more than I did. Now I see what a rediculousness that is. I wouldn't do them the disservice of saying that now that I have my own baby. I am reminded of a quotation from A Tree Grows in Brooklyn.
"The time has come at last- when you can no longer stand between your children and heartache. When there was no bread you went without so they would have plenty. And now they leave. They walk out in all innocence and right into the grief that you'd give your life to spare them."
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